Sheer Muscle Mass Wonít Help You Attract Women

Sheer Muscle Mass Wonít Help You Attract Women


If youíre a single guy and youíre looking to meet women, you have to think of this as a whole life makeover ñ not just lifting a few weights to beef up your body a bit.

Muscles and a toned physique are very important, donít get me wrong. Itís just that theyíre not the only thing that matters. You have to pair your excellent body building efforts with other things to make your single status disappear for good.

When It Comes to Muscles, Bigger Isnít Always Better

Men think bigger is better ñ women donít usually feel the same ñ not when it comes to your muscles, anyway. If you look at the lists of hottest men in Hollywood, you arenít going to see any beefy men on there who fill out an entire magazine page.

Instead, theyíre usually slender guys who have a fit physical structure. For example, you wonít see Hulk Hogan or enormous bodybuilders on the hot lists. What you will see are guys like Brad Pitt, Channing Tatum, etc.

Youíll hear lots of talk about how great Brad Pitt looked in Thelma and Louise ñ when he was trim, cut and toned looking. But you donít hear how hot he was in Fight Club, when he had bulked up for the role.

A woman likes several things when it comes to a manís body. Sheíd preferably like you to be taller than she is. She wants you to be tan (at least to the point of not stark white). And she wants you to be fit, not flabby.

If you have hair all over your body ñ especially your back, butt and chest, shave it. It will allow her to get a better look at your muscles, and help her avoid having to feel your hairy backside when she caresses you.

She wants you to be physically fit ñ toned and chiseled is great ñ but she isnít expecting perfection, and she doesnít want you to overdo it and end up looking like the Hulk after someone makes him angry one too many times.

Donít spot train so that you have huge, muscular arms and little tiny chicken legs. Give yourself a well-rounded workout routine so that you begin filling out and toning up all over.

That way youíll be prepared regardless of whether you meet a girl whoís into arms and chests or a girl who likes your butt and legs.

If You Lack Confidence, Your Muscles Wonít Do You Any Good

You can be as big as a house and no amount of muscle is going to make you attractive to a woman if you lack the one thing that draws her to you ñ confidence.

Thereís a reason why skinny, average guys can get the ladies ñ and it has nothing to do with money. It has to do with the way he carries himself and how he projects confidence to those around him.

Look at Johnny Depp. Heís not muscular. Heís quirky and if you take a good, hard look at him ñ thereís nothing exquisite about him. He has good bone structure and pretty eyes, but itís his swagger that makes women fall all over themselves for him.

There are a million unknown Johnny Depp types out in America ñ guys who have no massive muscles, but enough confidence to carry them through a night where women flock to them wherever they go.

There are also muscular guys who come off as so insecure that itís obvious theyíre hitting the gym to try to make up for it. A woman doesnít want you to be lacking in this department.

Yes, she wants you tone and fit. She loves strong arms, a flat stomach, a nice rear and strong legs. But she also wants you to believe that youíre a catch ñ so she doesnít have to talk herself into it.

Thereís a big difference between confidence and cockiness. Donít mistake the two. Cocky guys are really unattractive to women because itís just a man whoís full of himself ñ and she wants your attention to be on her, not your inflated ego.

How do you get confidence if you lack it? Well for starters, when you begin working on your physical self, your confidence will grow over time. As you lose flab or gain muscle, youíll feel better about yourself.

Girls love guys who walk standing tall, not hunched over. The way you carry yourself will tell her a great deal about how confident you are. If you rush around all nervously, making yourself small by pulling inward, sheíll avoid you.

Stand straight up and keep your head held high. Donít puff out your arms like some muscular guys do to make themselves look bigger. But donít allow your shoulders to sink in, either.

Take your time walking from one point to another ñ and smile and be friendly. Donít frantically look for someone ñ be the one people are looking at instead. There are all sorts of confidence courses you can take to work on this aspect of your life.

Do Things That Bring Attention to Your Strength

Some men believe that in order to look strong, it means they have to pick on other, smaller guys. This is a huge turn off to women. You want to be strong and positive, not a big oaf she has to constantly pull away from a fight when youíre out.

She wants you to be a gentleman. Use those strong arms to open doors and pull her seat out for her. Lend her a hand if sheís stepping out of a car or walking up a platform ñ this puts your forearms on display for a good cause.

If she has friends or family who need help with ìhoney doî tasks, like moving furniture, or hanging something on the wall, offer to help out in that area. Even though sheíll genuinely appreciate you helping, sheíll also be checking you out when youíre working hard.

Seeing a man do physical labor is a turn on for many women. They like to watch guys put their strength on display in the right way. It makes her feel protected and safe.

Women may not be verbal about checking you out ñ like how men whistle and make comments ñ but donít think sheís not checking out your butt when you bend over the lift something, or drooling over your six pack abs when you have to take off your shirt because youíre getting too hot and sweaty.

Make Sure Youíre Not Becoming a Muscle Head

Donít become so obsessed with your workout routines that you spend all of your waking hours in the gym. No woman wants to date a muscle head who doesnít know how to do anything else in life.

She might not mind hearing about your supplements once, but if thatís all your conversation consists of, youíre going to have a hard time keeping her interested. She doesnít care which Creatine youíre using or which flavor of protein powder you like best.

Save that kind of conversation for your fitness forums and discussions with your fellow guy friends who also work out. Try to initiate discussions about what she likes from time to time.

Make sure your wardrobe consists of more than just tank tops. Yes, she knows youíve been working those shoulders and arms ñ but sheíd like you to dress up a little more once in awhile.

What kind of dates will you take a woman on? Hint: sheís not impressed just because you stop by GNC to pick up some more muscle mass builders. To her, itís just an inconvenience on an otherwise romantic date.

Watch How Judgmental You Are

If youíre constantly talking about your body ñ its perfections and imperfections ñ itís going to intimidate them about their own bodies. Theyíll know for a fact that youíre picky about every little thing, so she wonít want to get undressed in front of you for fear that youíll be sizing her up, too.

If youíre always impressing yourself with your gains and losses and new weights, then sheís going to feel invisible to you. You need to take the focus off of body appearance and just look good for her, date someone who wants to look good for you, and connect in other ways.

This doesnít mean you canít do activities like working out or being into physical fitness as a couple, but let that gradually take on a role of its own, and not be the only thing you two have in common.

Why Donít Women Get off on Sheer Muscle Mass?

Muscles are great ñ toned, fit and trim isnít something women complain about. But it starts to become a problem when your muscles get out of control. Women dislike huge veins popping out of your body.

This might be something you think is really cool in the gym as youíre lifting, but to a woman, itís just gross. Some men look so massive they look like theyíre about to explode.

Have you ever seen a cartoon character suddenly puff up into a balloon-like being? Thatís how some guys look when they work out too much. They lose their necks, they can barely walk because their legs are so large, and their arms canít go down by their sides because the bulk is too big.

This isnít a good look on anyone.

Show that you care about your appearance. Dress nice, wear the right amount of cologne, be clean ñ and get physically fit. But donít obsess about it to the point where you scare women off because they wouldnít even want to touch you.

Some guys who get into bodybuilding also get into hardcore tanning. Itís great to remove the white, pasty appearance ñ but donít turn yourself into an Oompah Loompah from Willy Wonka, either.

Keep in mind that as women grow older, their priorities change. A very young 18-upper 20s woman might be more into physique than a woman who is in her 30s or beyond and looking to settle down.

Her interests will change from wanting to party with you and show you off as her hunky boyfriend to someone who wants you to have goals and be thinking of a future with her.

Women (even young ones) are interested in the intelligence of a man, too ñ not just his physical attractiveness. Even if she covets muscles in her youth, sheís still thinking long-term and how youíll parlay that fine body into a future with her.

That means you need to be well-rounded in life. Pursue an education, have a job and strive for something even better, and yes ñ maintain health and physical fitness while youíre at it.

Todayís alpha male doesnít win that title based on how wide or bulky his body is. The modern man is considered alpha if heís ahead on intellect ñ because then he can provide for the family, along with his wife.

One thing that some polls and studies show is that women tend to have short-term flings with muscular men, but settle down with average guys who donít have that perfect physique.

This may be because guys who focus more on muscles than anything else usually donít have the other qualities sheís looking for ñ like loyalty. A big, muscular guy often sets out on a quest to attract as many women as possible to stroke his ego.

Women are also jealous creatures. When theyíre dating a hot, built man it makes it hard to feel comfortable with the situation. Everyone wants him ñ and she has to fight for his attention.

Compare that to an average looking guy who fits the bill in the stability, generosity, and humor departments and guess who wins out? A fling with a hot muscle man might be fun for a night, but anything longer is just exhausting and not worth it to most women.

Do yourself a favor. Do a head to toe analysis of where you can stand to lose flab, put on muscle and get fit. Then work on it on a regular basis. But donít let it rule your life. And donít allow it to become the only thing youíre known for, either.


The following two tabs change content below.

Layla Lopez

Layla Lopez is a success coach and dating adviser she has three boys of her own and lives in the gym in LA. She has made a living in the online dating industry for the last 5 years. Her favorite quote is "It's raining men…hallelujah!"

Leave a reply